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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27261265">See Me, Feel Me</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/firecat/pseuds/firecat'>firecat</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Sex, Bifrost, Biting, Canon Divergence - Post-Thor: Ragnarok (2017), First Time, Healing Sex, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, Lost in space - Freeform, Loud Sex, M/M, Magic, Magical Healing Cock, Masochism, Masturbation, Minor amounts of blood, Oral Sex, Psychic damage, Sexual Inexperience, Tesseract, Triggers, Voyeurism, psychic torture, reluctant-allies-to-lovers</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 01:34:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,522</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27261265</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/firecat/pseuds/firecat</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>On the Asgardian refugee ship, Loki uses the Tesseract to escape Thanos. The ship is lost in space and Loki is psychically damaged. Heimdall, reeling  from his own loss, tries to help him.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Heimdall/Loki</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Trick or Treat Exchange 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>See Me, Feel Me</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snickfic/gifts">Snickfic</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I loved your prompts. Enjoy! </p><p>Takes place immediately following the post-credits scene in Thor: Ragnarok.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Where’s Loki?” Heimdall suddenly asked in the midst of it all.</p><p>Nobody paid attention.</p><p>The ship full of Asgardian refugees had been under attack from a ship ten times its size.</p><p>Thanos’s ship.</p><p>And then, all of a sudden, they were...<i>elsewhere.</i> </p><p>Nobody knew where. The region didn’t show up in any mapped space, at least the parts that the cargo ship stolen from Sakaar admitted to knowing about. </p><p>The transition had been...rough, to say the least. The ship had shuddered as if it would split apart, and many had been injured. Although so far it didn’t seem any of the physical injuries were serious. </p><p>Still, the refugees were scared. To be expected. They were the last of their race, had just witnessed the utter destruction of the only world they knew, and had no idea where they were going next. Thor had tried to reassure them that Earth would be welcoming, but what did they know?</p><p>And now it seemed Earth, too, was lost to them.</p><p>Only a few on board guessed what had happened. Heimdall was one of them. And he realized that they’d need the expertise of the one who had made it happen, to help figure out what to do next.</p><p>But first, they had to find him.</p><p>Heimdall brought his Farsight to bear.</p><p>It wasn’t as potent away from the Observatory over the Bifröst that had been his home for millennia. He could no longer See ten trillion souls. But he’d had some practice honing his native abilities, during the months he’d been an outlaw, gathering in the forests and foothills with those who disliked Loki’s occasionally capricious rule. And then overseeing the flight of hundreds more from the far deadlier monster who was Hela. </p><p>The ship was large, but Heimdall’s Sight scanned it in a moment. Once, twice. Seeing nothing. A third time, and — <i>there.</i></p><p>Heimdall switched back to his ordinary sight. The other leaders — Thor, Valkyrie, and Korg, the guy made of rocks — were all busy handling minor crises, calming the refugees. The task was going to fall to him. </p><p>For the best, perhaps. He probably knew more about Loki than anyone else on the ship, than anyone alive, even Thor. </p><p>Because Heimdall had Seen some of what happened to Loki when he fell from the Bifröst and was taken by Thanos. </p><p>He’d always meant to talk to someone about it — Thor, Frigga, Sif perhaps. But the time had never seemed right, and so he still carried the burden of the knowledge alone.</p><p>The ship carried several hundred souls, although it was designed to hold far fewer. Loki had found the one spot that afforded any privacy. It was a supply closet. When Heimdall entered, he saw in the shadows a person curled into a ball, rocking and hissing a little.</p><p>“Loki, it’s Heimdall.”</p><p>The hissing stopped, but the ball stayed a ball. </p><p>Heimdall felt Loki try to reinforce the illusion that rendered him unnoticeable. This magic of Loki’s could usually fool even Heimdall.  But right now it was weak. It might be keeping Loki hidden from most of the people on board, but not from the powerful Sight of the former Gatekeeper.</p><p>“Go away,” the ball said, having realized the illusion was not working.</p><p>“I will not,” said Heimdall. “You’re the one who brought us here. We might need you to find our way out again. </p><p>“You no longer have a Gatekeeper job, so you are appointing yourself to gatekeep me instead?” The ball sounded bitter and resigned. “I doubt that there’s much I can get up to on this ship that would be entertaining to you.”</p><p>“And yet you are the one who just brought the ship to a unknown part of the universe. We are still trying to work out exactly where we are.”</p><p>“Excuse me for working in a hurry. It mattered more to escape Thanos than to sit down with maps and plot a pleasant route first.”</p><p>“Since I believe you saved all our lives, I excuse you. Did you use the Tesseract?”</p><p>The ball emitted a confirming grunt. </p><p>“So, you and the Tesseract were what attracted Thanos. And you and the Tesseract were also how we evaded Thanos. The irony field is high in this realm of space,” remarked Heimdall. </p><p>“And if I don’t die from the physical and psychic exhaustion I incurred from using the Tesseract to transport this entire ship, then I’ll be brutally murdered for bringing it on board at all,” Loki said sarcastically. </p><p>Heimdall used his Sight. There were no obvious wounds on Loki’s body, no internal damage. But his face was ashen, and his body was gaunt and ravaged, as if using the Tesseract had consumed not only his magic, but part of his physical body as well. His eyes were haunted.</p><p>“The last time you used so much of its power...” began Heimdall.</p><p>“…I opened a dimensional portal. But only with the help of a machine that my minions on Earth built for me.” </p><p>“And this time, no machine. Just your considerable resources. Intelligence. Will. Magic. Stamina,” Heimdall mused, talking as much to himself as to Loki.</p><p>“Said resources already somewhat depleted, what with the escape from Sakaar and the battle on the Bifröst,” Loki went on. </p><p>He seemed eager to explain himself, which Heimdall was glad of. It meant some of his will still survived.</p><p>“And I had no choice but to take the Tesseract," Loki went on. “Although I’m sure the way it will go down in legend is that I stole it, simply because I could, or to sell, or to use it to threaten someone.”</p><p>“Of course you had to take it,” affirmed Heimdall. “No one with any sense would have left the Tesseract kicking about in the ruins of Asgard after Surtur got through destroying it. Who knows who might come across it then?”</p><p>“Say that at my funeral, then,” Loki said wryly. “Here lies Loki, God of Mischief, and a guy who occasionally had some sense.”</p><p>“I’m not planning your funeral yet,” Heimdall countered firmly. “There’s plenty of mischief still to do.”</p><p>Heimdall was never sure how Loki managed to make silence come across as sullen, but he was doing it now.</p><p>“I can always tell when you are Looking at me, you know,” said Loki eventually. </p><p><i>So Loki knew I was coming to him,</i> Heimdall thought. <i>He knew and he didn’t run.</i> It meant either that Loki was too weak to run, or that he didn’t mind Heimdall being here. Or both. </p><p>“I only figured that out recently,” Heimdall told him. “That explains why I never caught you disappearing yourself from my Sight,” Heimdall said. “You checked whether I was watching you first.”</p><p>With a low sigh, the Loki-sized ball uncurled itself. Slowly, and with some labored breathing. He sat on the floor with his back to a supply cabinet, staring at the ceiling. </p><p>Heimdall felt a sudden urge to go to him, but he held back.</p><p>“Hiding myself from your Sight was one of the most difficult magics to master,” said Loki. “If I hadn’t needed it to carry out some of my plans, I probably would be a poorer sorcerer.” He huffed quietly. “And if I’d failed to learn it, perhaps Asgard would still be standing.”</p><p>“I know you like to be the center of attention,” Heimdall retorted, “but that doesn’t mean you’re responsible for <i>everything</i> bad that happens.”</p><p>“I beg you, Gatekeeper, allow me my megalomania,” said Loki. </p><p>In the dimness, Heimdall could see the ghost of a smile on his lips. </p><p>Heimdall chuckled. “And you also paid my abilities a very twisted compliment just now. But I doubt I’ll get any straight ones, so I’ll take it.”</p><p>“How well you know me,” said Loki wryly.</p><p>“Speaking of your influence over my Sight,” Heimdall said, “could you also influence me to turn my attention <i>toward</i> you?” </p><p>Loki didn’t speak. </p><p>“I ask because I usually can’t see into Thanos’s realm. But when you were imprisoned there, I sometimes got glimpses into it,” Heimdall clarified.</p><p>Heimdall thought he saw Loki shudder.</p><p>“The magic I learned can either reduce or amplify your Sight,” Loki said. “I wanted you to see. I never knew until now whether it had worked.” His eyes met Heimdall’s, large and curious and slightly accusatory. </p><p>“I’m sorry,” Heimdall said. “There was nothing we could have done to get you out. The glimpses I had weren’t enough. But I’m sorry that I never told anyone. Or mentioned it to you.”</p><p>“No, I’m glad you never told anyone. And there was never quite the right moment to mention it to me, was there?”</p><p>“As you say.” Heimdall took a step toward Loki. “Speaking of my Sight, I can’t help but notice that you are unwell, my prince. I’m afraid you might be dying.”</p><p>“Oh, I’m ‘my prince’ now? That’s very generous of you, Heimdall, given how I’ve treated you over the years. Yes, Heimdall, I am very unwell. When I used the Tesseract, it…punctured me psychically. My life force is draining out — possibly too fast for my healing magic to repair. Do we have any psychic surgeons on board?” </p><p>Loki was being ironic. Psychic surgery was something only the most advanced sorcerers learned. Heimdall didn’t know if even Loki had learned it. There were certainly no other sorcerers on board with that degree of power. Although —</p><p>“Thor seems to have developed some new ways to use his power,” Heimdall said. “Perhaps he can do something. I will fetch him.” He turned for the door.</p><p><i>“No,”</i> said Loki firmly. “Thor has enough things to do and he can’t afford to waste energy or worry on me.”</p><p>“Loki, I can’t let you die for the sake of your pride in not accepting help from Thor. We on this ship are all that’s left of Asgard, a few hundred souls, and we need you, your knowledge, your skill.” </p><p>Heimdall heard Loki groan quietly. “When will it be enough?” he whispered to himself, in a voice full of pain. </p><p>“As long as you care, never,” said Heimdall. “And I hope you continue to care.”</p><p>“You curse me with those words,” Loki said bitterly.</p><p>“I know,” said Heimdall. </p><p>“Well, if you’re going to stand there and watch my body decide whether or not to die, you might as well entertain me,” said Loki. “Talk to me. You’ve seen more of life than anyone else in the universe. You must have some good tales to tell.”</p><p>“Very well,” Heimdall said. He took a step closer to Loki, then sat on the floor within reach of him. The floor vibrated slightly with the working of some ship’s machinery or other.</p><p>“Did you ever take the time to stand on the Rainbow Bridge and look, really look?” Heimdall asked. “I did that year in and year out, for millennia. Few others did it even once.”</p><p>“I did take the time on occasion,” Loki said. “Now I regret that I did not do it more often.”</p><p>“Even millennia was too little time to appreciate its marvels,” said Heimdall. He conjured the vision up in his mind’s eye. “The long bridge of many colors. Five horses could ride abreast. Stars and galaxies laid out across the sky.”</p><p>To his surprise, Loki spoke. </p><p>“You stood at the end of it. Resplendent in golden armor. Your horned helmet, under which shone your tawny eye. The all seeing eye. You often said you could see nine Realms and ten trillion souls.” </p><p>Heimdall was moved that Loki had remembered him so. They had so often been at odds.</p><p>“How proud I was of my role in keeping them all from harm,” Heimdall said, and he could not keep anguish from his voice. </p><p>“I remember you with your sword, the key to the great machinery of your Observatory, gripped in both your hands.” </p><p>“When I activated the machine, I felt like the still point away from which the rest of the universe expanded,” Heimdall recalled. </p><p>Loki closed his eyes. This time, the expression that fleetingly crossed his face was not pain, but reverence.</p><p>Heimdall wasn’t sure he should share what he thought of next. He had told no one else. “It was only after I fled the Observatory that I realized I’d developed some kind of symbiosis with it. I’d always felt pleasure while working the machinery. But I hadn’t realized that it was part of what nourished me.” </p><p>“I am sorry I forced you into exile,” said Loki, after a pause. “It seemed so important at the time, whatever little faux pas you committed.”</p><p>“You mean, my fomenting a rebellion against your rule?” Heimdall said. “Not exactly the same kind of ‘little faux pas’ as using the wrong fork on the dessert course.”</p><p>Loki laughed, and then coughed several times. </p><p>“Besides,” Heimdall went on, “if it hadn’t been for the rebellion, I would never have been able to round up so many refugees so fast when Hela arrived. We had tapped into local communities, so the word went out quickly. We saved hundreds more than we could have without it.”</p><p>“Since you chastised me the last time I blamed the fall of Asgard on myself, I will refrain from mentioning my role in bringing about Hela’s return,” Loki said.</p><p>“What was your role?” Heimdall asked. But when Loki explained, he simply said, “In that case, it would have happened sooner or later anyway.” </p><p>“Yes. I doubt Odin would ever have gotten around to telling us that his death would unlock Hela’s prison. You see where I get some of my penchant for illusion and deceit. For all that I was not the son of his blood.”</p><p>Heimdall stood. He suddenly felt restless, and he had begun to suspect that part of Loki’s malady was simply lack of sustenance. “My lord, let me fetch some food and drink for you.”</p><p>“Swear on your honor as an Asgardian that you will not bring anyone else in here.”</p><p>“I swear,” said Heimdall.</p><p>“<i>And</i> that you won’t open the door and walk away so that others might enter on their own.”</p><p>Heimdall laughed. “I swear it, my prince. I only ever hoped to get away with that once.”</p><p>In the chaos, tracking down food and drink took Heimdall longer than he expected. His Sight told him Loki had not moved from his hiding place. But when Heimdall returned, he saw that Loki had lost ground. His eyes were hollow, his skin grayish. </p><p>Perhaps the presence of another kept his life force from draining so quickly?</p><p>Heimdall sat a little closer to him, on the floor. Loki seemed to appreciate his company, but he only picked at the food. Clearly it wasn’t the kind of nourishment he needed.</p><p>“Do you know how Thanos tortured me?” asked Loki suddenly.</p><p>“You showed me some of it.”</p><p>“Not the worst parts,” said Loki.</p><p>“Tell me,” offered Heimdall. </p><p>“The worst wasn’t the physical pain. Not by itself. Seven Hells, I <i>like</i> pain. His servant tried to threaten me. ‘You’ll long for something as sweet as pain.’ Not a threat to me, just a truth about my usual state of mind.”
</p><p>“I know,” said Heimdall. </p><p>Loki regarded him for a moment, something like surprise on his face, and then he chuckled drily. “Of course you do. You’re the ultimate voyeur, aren’t you?”</p><p>“I am,” Heimdall admitted. </p><p>He’d never told anybody, and he wasn’t sure why he was telling Loki now. It wasn’t as if he trusted Loki to keep his secrets. Perhaps this simply didn’t need to be a secret any more.</p><p>“I’m not sure why I never thought of <i>that</i> aspect of being able to see ten billion souls! Thank the gods you couldn’t see what we got up to on Sakaar.”</p><p>“Yes, thank the gods,” agreed Heimdall. </p><p>This line of conversation was simultaneously exciting and deeply uncomfortable. So he turned back to Loki’s original topic.</p><p>“If the pain wasn’t the torture, what was?”</p><p>“Thanos would give me visions,” Loki said. “He would show me how I could have been happy. I lived out countless happy lives, each one brought about by a choice I could have made differently. Glory. Power. Popularity. Even...family. Love.” Loki’s voice held a wistful note. “He would laugh, and say that I was so exquisitely dedicated to my own self-destruction, my life was a work of art worthy of the Collector’s interest.” </p><p>Heimdall let out a gusty breath ending in a hiss. He wanted to kill Thanos so very slowly. But he also realized Thanos was right about Loki’s singular aim toward self-destruction, and didn’t know how to respond.</p><p>“You’re thinking he was right,” said Loki, with only the mildest degree of accusation. </p><p>Heimdall avoided the implied question. “Surely it wasn’t the first time you’d been told such a thing.” </p><p>“Of course not.”</p><p>Heimdall understood. He didn’t need Loki to spell it out, which would add to his humiliation. The torture wasn’t simply the visions, or the comment about self-destruction. It was those things combined with Loki’s imprisonment. His utter helplessness. His isolation. </p><p>Yes, no wonder Loki was a little mad. </p><p>Loki had a coughing fit and slumped to the floor, exhausted.</p><p>Heimdall shifted nearer to him. He lifted Loki’s head and shoulders and brought a canteen of water to his lips. Loki sucked on it thirstily. </p><p>When Loki was finished drinking, Heimdall drew back a little, but kept his hand resting on the back of Loki’s neck. </p><p>Either the water or the physical contact, or both, seemed to revive him a little.</p><p>Loki tilted his head back, squeezing Heimdall’s hand a little. He chuckled wryly. “How often you must have wished to crush my neck,” he said. “And now you can.”</p><p>“I never wished that,” said Heimdall. </p><p>“Even when I encased you in ice and let Jotuns into the Realm?”</p><p>“I was angry and frightened, but I didn’t want to kill you. That wouldn’t have solved anything.”</p><p>“Ah, you’re one of those people who only have <i>sensible</i> feelings.”</p><p>Heimdall snorted. “That’s really how people see me, isn’t it?”</p><p>“Mostly, they didn’t see you at all,” said Loki. </p><p>Heimdall didn’t know what to do with this. “What do you mean?”</p><p>“You disappeared into your function. When did most people ever see you away from the Observatory? When did they have the opportunity to see you without your fine golden armor? Without your massive broadsword, the key to the Bifröst? When did they have a chance to think about the man behind the massive machinery that controlled access to all the far-flung realms? That generated so much power it could destroy a planet if misused?”</p><p>Heimdall was stung, and still not willing to face Loki’s truths about him. “Yes, about that,” he said, a little harshly. “In the millennia that I was Gatekeeper, I only ever used the power of the Bifröst as a gate. But the first time, the <i>very first time</i> you used it, you used it as a weapon — and tried to destroy an entire Realm.” </p><p>Loki snorted. “And in some of those same millennia, I watched it being used as a gate only, when it could also have been used as a weapon, or at least a deterrent. Invade us? No problem. We’ll just destroy your Realm with the energy of the Bifröst! But whenever I mentioned it, I was shouted down by traditionalist rule-mongers. ‘But we’ve always used it only as a gate! It would be sacrilege to use it for any other purpose!’”</p><p>“Always have to look for the new way to do something, don’t you?” Heimdall snapped, more angrily than he intended to. “The ways we’ve used before aren’t ever good enough?”</p><p>“I stand so accused, yes,” Loki readily admitted. Then he slumped a little. “Although, being on Sakaar was enough to considerably dampen that urge. Nothing was ever done the same way twice there. For all that one of my names is God of Chaos, there’s such a thing as too much of it.” </p><p>They both fell silent then, because they both became aware of how Heimdall’s fingers were combing through the black waves of Loki’s hair. Heimdall stilled his hand, but didn’t remove it. And Loki didn’t move away. Their gazes locked, then each looked in another direction. </p><p>“We’re quite the pair, aren’t we?” said Loki at last.</p><p>“How so? We just spent the past five minutes talking about how different we are.” </p><p>“Icing on the cake, Heimdall.”</p><p>“We’ve clashed any number of times over rules. Over truth.”</p><p>Loki laughed. “There is that. I always marveled, you know. That even when you were abetting deception, you were doing it by the rules. ‘I want to report a treason — mine.’ Sneakier than I gave you credit for.”</p><p>Heimdall chuckled too. “I may be set in my ways, but that doesn’t mean I am incapable of learning when shown a good example.”</p><p>“My good example of deceptiveness, you mean?”</p><p>“Just so.”</p><p>“The fates are having a good laugh at our expense, are they not?” says Loki. “And yet, I still say that fundamentally we’re the same. Because we’re both alone in the world.”</p><p>“You have a family, Loki, even if you don’t always get along with them. You’re not alone.”</p><p>“Not sure ‘don’t always get along’ is strong enough to encompass their locking me in a dungeon for years. But you’ll say I deserved it, and I’ll argue but privately agree, and that’s not what I meant, so let’s skip that. I meant, each of us sees the world in a unique way. You in your Observatory, seeing all, but invisible yourself...”</p><p>Heimdall saw it then, as clearly as if the sun illuminated the palace courtyard on a bright summer day. A feeling of excitement overtook him, as when he used his Farsight and beheld something entirely new to him. </p><p>“And you,” he said, grasping Loki’s hand and fixing him with a gaze full of wonder. “With skills and lore known to so few others. Seeing a weapon where others see a gate is only the beginning, isn’t it?”</p><p>To Heimdall’s confusion, Loki suddenly shrank in on himself, like a dog expecting to receive a blow from its master. </p><p>“Heimdall. Stop. <i>Stop looking at me,”</i> he rasped out. His eyes were shut, his voice wracked with pain, and his hand gripped Heimdall’s with desperate strength.</p><p>Heimdall froze. </p><p>“Don’t you understand? <i>He</i> was the last one who saw me,” Loki whispered. “Who understood what I was capable of. And he tormented me with it. He told me he was the only one who would ever understand me. He told me he’d hone me into the ultimate weapon. He told me he’d leave me my conscience, <i>because it would make the weapon that much sharper, to be wielded in pain.”</i> </p><p>Loki tried to curl into a ball again.</p><p>“Loki,” said Heimdall. “Look at me.”</p><p>Loki opened his eyes. They were the color of emerald. Heimdall had never noticed that before. </p><p>“Who do you see?” Heimdall asked.</p><p>Loki’s words came slowly at first. “A god. Patient. Implacable. Far-seeing. Devoted to good rule, to his people.” </p><p>His voice gained a little strength as he warmed to his theme. </p><p>“He’s been torn from his home and has yet to find shelter. And he is so dreadfully cold. So cold that to be near his people burns him, and his only comfort lies in seeking out someone similarly cold. Similarly shelterless.”</p><p>Loki fell silent but continued to look into Heimdall’s golden eyes.</p><p>“The Loki who sees me…is not the Loki Thanos saw,” Heimdall said. “He might have understood how he could make a tool, a weapon out of you. But you are more than a weapon. So much more. He didn’t understand <i>you.”</i></p><p>Heimdall wasn’t clear what happened next. Did he draw Loki’s face to his, or the other way around? He only knew the moment when their lips met. </p><p>Loki’s mouth was cold. It took Heimdall a moment to remember that this wasn’t evidence of his illness. Loki was Jotun. </p><p>Heimdall didn’t mind giving Loki some of his physical warmth. Not when Loki’s lips were so soft. The way he moved them against Heimdall’s mouth was so focused and intent, he could have meant to use the memories to create a sculpture. </p><p>Heimdall lifted Loki onto his lap. He was too light, as if the damage the Tesseract had done to him had replaced the stuff of his body with aerogel. Heimdall caressed Loki’s face. For the first time, he wished that he could share with another exactly what he Saw. He wanted Loki to see himself as Heimdall did in this moment. One who had saved his people, knowing the cost to himself — to be chased across the Universe by his own worst nightmare, for as long as he held the Tesseract. </p><p>And the part that mattered to no one but Heimdall, at this moment: His beauty. The expressive, changeable face, the flexible mouth, the long, silky hair. The eyes that now looked at Heimdall as if he were an entirely new and wonderful species of life. The long fingers that traced his cheek. </p><p>They whispered each other’s names. Then Heimdall sunk to the floor on his back, and Loki straddled his big body, and they continued the slow, explorative kisses. </p><p>Heimdall could scarcely remember the last time he’d kissed someone. His role and his Farsight and taking care of the machinery of the Observatory had fulfilled him in ways no physical coupling ever had. </p><p>But something about this was different. Profoundly so. Was it Loki’s sexual charisma, for which he’d been infamous on Asgard in his youth? Heimdall had noticed it before, but had never felt personally moved by it. Was it the way energy flowed between them? Was that the touch of Loki’s magic, or did their powers combine to make some new kind of magic, in which there was a little of what Heimdall felt when he opened the Bifröst? </p><p>Was it, as Loki had suggested, their mutual loneliness? Or the way each saw the other? </p><p>All he knew was that he was soon utterly lost in what he and Loki were creating with their mouths, their hands, so slowly that it was a cry of rebellion against the press of time.</p><p>With every moment that passed, every new exploration of what was possible between them, Heimdall felt Loki <i>solidify</i> a little more. Press more deliciously against Heimdall’s body. And parts of Heimdall’s soul — parts he hadn’t realized were empty — begin to moisten and fill, parched desert springs drinking sprinkles of gentle rain.</p><p>Loki was the more experienced of them, and Heimdall let him take the lead, but as he began to see Loki strengthen, he held back none of his own desire. </p><p>“How do you work this bloody buckle?” Loki demanded, reaching around Heimdall’s back to unfasten his tunic. “That’s it, I’m going to magic it off.” </p><p>Heimdall caught Loki’s hand before it could make the gesture. “No, Loki, don’t you need to conserve your magic?” Heimdall plucked at the buckle’s hidden fastener. Loki growled and yanked open the sleeveless garment, leaning over to kiss the brown skin and run his hands along the contours of the thick muscles. Loki sucked on his nipples, while Heimdall’s hips writhed under his. </p><p>Heimdall reached between them to fumble with Loki’s leather shirt. “My tunic is easy to unfasten compared to this,” he complained.</p><p>“Why do you think I use magic to change clothes all the time?” Loki said, and with a gesture, his leather armor migrated from his body into a neatly folded pile on the floor. He winced slightly, as if the effort had been too much for him.</p><p>“What did I tell you about using your magic?” Heimdall groused. “Now be still. If you’re going to go so much effort to bare this body for me, I want to touch it.”</p><p>Loki moaned as Heimdall worshipped his body, every part he could reach, with his hands. He pulled Loki’s face down to his and kissed him, wrapping his hands around Loki’s back to press their bodies together. Heimdall felt dizzy, exhilerated, the same way he used to feel when the Observatory began to spin, preparing to open to another Realm. The heat he felt in his groin, though, as he pressed against Loki’s bare thighs, was new. He couldn’t decide what to do first, get rid of the accursed layer of leather that separated their cocks, or take the measure of Loki’s hardness with his hands. But since Loki was crouched over him, that would require him to stop kissing the god.</p><p>He continued the kiss, letting Loki worry at his lips. So this was what it felt like to <i>like pain.</i> Heimdall could get used to this. </p><p>Loki licked Heimdall’s lip where it stung, and chuckled. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to draw blood. My enthusiasm seems to have gotten away with me.”</p><p>Heimdall only growled and bit back. Not hard enough to draw blood, but enough to tear a cry of pleasure from Loki’s throat.</p><p>Heimdall gradually started to feel overwhelmed. He was used to watching, not doing. But this felt so good...</p><p>Loki sat up, still straddling him, and gazed into his face. </p><p>“I know what you want,” he said in a teasing voice. He scooted backward until he was straddling Heimdall’s thighs, and took his own cock in both hands. “You want to watch me.” </p><p>Eyes fastened on Heimdall’s face, lips slightly parted, Loki began stroking himself, slowly, sometimes using both hands on his cock, sometimes only one, and teasing his nipples with his fingertips.</p><p>“How often have you watched me do this to myself before?” Loki wanted to know, after performing for Heimdall for several minutes. </p><p>“Often enough to know that the next thing you’re going to do is pull at your balls. And then you’re going to use two hands to stroke yourself. And then you’ll play with your left nipple.”</p><p>Loki had to stop because he was laughing so hard. “I had no idea I was <i>that</i> predictable about it.”</p><p>“I’ve <i>watched</i> enough. Bring it here so I can <i>touch</i> it,” demanded Heimdall. </p><p>Loki scooted up  Heimdall’s stomach. He put his hands behind his head, offering himself. Heimdall ran his hands down the beautiful chest, over the furry belly, and then wrapped them around Loki’s cock. It was rigid, and long, and perfect. And the gasps Loki let out as Heimdall stroked and teased it were like the summer thunderstorms that streaked across the Bifröst, pouring life into Heimdall’s heart.</p><p>“Close,” Loki warned, far before Heimdall was ready to stop. </p><p>“Put it in my mouth,” he said. </p><p>“Really?” Loki asked. </p><p>“Put it in my mouth or I’ll flip you on your back and take it myself. Which wouldn’t be fair, taking advantage of your weakened condition.” </p><p>Loki laughed wickedly. “I hope we get the opportunity to do this again. You’re going to be a <i>fun</i> playmate when I have my strength back.” </p><p><i>When,</i> Heimdall noted, and something deep within him relaxed and opened. The name of it was hope.</p><p>“Very well, Gatekeeper,” Loki was continuing. “Take it.” In one swift move he settled over Heimdall’s face. </p><p>Based on what he had Seen when he spied on Loki, Heimdall expected him to ram it in all at once. He didn’t know what he’d do with that much cock, but he didn’t care. </p><p>But Loki only put the tip in. He let Heimdall draw him down into his mouth, suck him as deep as he wanted.</p><p>It had been so long since Heimdall had done this, it was almost like doing it for the first time. He felt the way he did when he Saw something new in a Realm he hadn’t visited in a while. He savored the taste, the velvety texture, the way Loki’s hips bucked when his tongue moved over the tip just the way he liked. His own cock swelled and tightened until he was harder than he ever remembered being. </p><p>“Coming,” Loki gritted out. “Last chance.”</p><p>Heimdall pulled the cock in as deep as he could, and let Loki’s come fill his mouth. Their groans of satisfaction were loud and simultaneous. If they kept on making this much noise, someone would certainly discover them. Heimdall couldn’t bring himself to care.</p><p>Loki let himself fall against Heimdall’s chest, and then he was kissing him deeply. “Let me taste myself,” he said, and licked into Heimdall’s mouth. </p><p>They lay quietly for a few moments, lazily sucking and biting at each other’s lips.</p><p>“And now, I want to touch and taste <i>you,”</i> said Loki finally. “Off with your trousers, if you want me to preserve my precious magic.” </p><p>He climbed off Heimdall and did his best to distract him with kisses while Heimdall took off his shoes and wriggled out of his leather trousers.</p><p>Loki crawled down to his ankles, slowly caressing and kissing his way up the muscular calves and thighs. Then he wrapped both his hands around Heimdall’s aching cock. </p><p>“That’s cold!” Heimdall gasped.</p><p>“That’s what you get when you fuck a Jotun, Gatekeeper,” Loki said. “Although some parts of me are warmer than others.” With that, Heimdall felt moist heat around the tip of his cock, and then Loki’s slick tongue teasing it. He bit back a howl. Then Loki was using both his hands and his mouth. The hot and cool on his skin...like the Bifröst in winter, when the fiery stars in the night sky danced with the sea, surging, thick with ice.</p><p>“If I suck you off now, Rebel Leader, how long until you’re ready to fuck me?” Loki asked. </p><p>“Loki,” Heimdall gasped. “The way you make me feel? About five minutes.”</p><p>Loki made a satisfied noise and slid his mouth down onto Heimdall’s cock, taking it all the way to the base. </p><p>Heimdall tried hard to make himself last, but Loki wouldn’t let him. </p><p>“Come. Come now. Stop holding back. I need it,” Loki said, or words to that effect, each time he came up for air. “I’m a poor, weakened Loki. I need my nourishment. I need healing. Give me your pleasure. Give me your come.” </p><p>Heimdall clapped both hands over his mouth when Loki finally pulled the orgasm out of him, swallowing around his cock again and again, until he felt Loki would suck his very soul out. He tried to be quiet, but his cries echoed around the little room. </p><p>“Shhh,” said Loki chastisingly after he’d finished milking every drop. “We can’t let them find us until you’re finished fucking me.” </p><p>Loki lay full length on him, circling his hips, kissing and nipping at his mouth. Heimdall tasted himself in Loki’s mouth, and…</p><p>“Heimdall. It’s been less than five minutes,” Loki whispered eagerly, ghosting his fingers over Heimdall’s swelling cock.</p><p>“I don’t recall anyone ever calling you the God of Sex, but I think you are high up in the competition for the title,” Heimdall told him, and then he moaned as that cold hand wrapped around him, tugging gently.</p><p>“It’s a relief to know you didn’t spy on <i>every</i> one of my liaisons,” said Loki. “Because it’s not the first time I’ve been called that.”</p><p>“You are such a braggart,” said Heimdall. </p><p>“It’s nothing but the truth, for once,” Loki objected. “Although,” he added wistfully, “it has been a long time. I’m not counting what happened on Sakaar, of course. I’d only trust it coming from an Asgardian.” </p><p>“Well, I’m inexperienced. But if Valkyrie were to say it, that you could certainly trust.”</p><p>“Hmmm,” said Loki. Then he dipped his head to lick a stripe up Heimdall’s cock, now fully hard again. “Heimdall. Fuck me. Fill me,” he begged. Or was it a demand? </p><p>Loki had been taking the lead so far, so Heimdall hadn’t expected this. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to give Loki what he wanted. But he damn well was going to try.</p><p>“How do you want me?” Loki asked.</p><p>“Ride me,” said Heimdall. “Show me how you like it.”</p><p>Loki slid down onto his cock, inch by inch. Heimdall expected it rough and fast when Loki had finished sheathing him. But Loki stilled over him, around him, his forehead pressed to Heimdall’s. Together they experienced simply filling, being filled, being joined.</p><p>Loki began moving slowly. </p><p>“You’re so big inside me,” he whispered. “I’m so <i>full.</i> It’s glorious. I’d trade a dozen great victories in battle for being filled by this cock.”</p><p>“You mean, my cock could be an instrument of peace?” Heimdall chuckled. Then he groaned as Loki flexed around him. </p><p>“Then from being the Gatekeeper you’d become the Peacekeeper,” said Loki. </p><p>“I’m not fucking any Svartálfar or Fire Demons,” objected Heimdall. </p><p>“It would be wise to avoid such things, I agree,” said Loki. He began to move a little faster, trading the quips for a gasp of pleasure each time he sank down on Heimdall, filling himself deeply. </p><p>Heimdall hoped he would last long enough for Loki. Every stroke squeezed him so tightly, so perfectly. Loki’s moans were becoming more urgent. Heimdall put a hand over Loki’s mouth, and he bit at it. Loki’s cock was hard and leaking and sliding against Heimdall’s belly as he rocked back and forth. Heimdall needed a third hand, because he wanted so badly to stroke it, but one of his hands was covering Loki’s mouth and the other his own. </p><p>Finally Heimdall got what he wanted, as Loki moved Heimdall’s hand to his cock and covered his mouth with his own hand.</p><p>Loki’s rocking movements were longer now. Again and again, he withdrew himself from Heimdall’s cock almost all the way, only to shove back down onto it to the root. A rivulet of blood was trickling down his hand from where he’d bitten it trying to keep quiet. </p><p>“Won’t last much longer,” Heimdall gasped, feeling tension gather in his groin, pleasure surging through him with every one of Loki’s strokes.</p><p>“Fill me,” Loki moaned. “Fill me, fill me, <i>fill me.”</i> His last words a loud cry.</p><p>The orgasm tore out of Heimdall like a tidal wave. His hips thrust upward, pushing him even deeper into Loki as he came.</p><p>Loki’s cock spurted over his hand, his belly.</p><p>They’d both forgotten completely about keeping quiet, and the combined roar of pleasure they let out could probably have been heard across the Nine Realms.</p><p>There were shouts from the corridor.</p><p><i>“I think I hear them!”</i> came Valkyrie’s voice. <i>“This way!”</i> </p><p><i>“Coming!”</i> cried Thor’s voice. </p><p>The corridor echoed with running footsteps. </p><p>“Loki…<i>clothes,”</i> Heimdall whispered urgently. </p><p>Loki threw back his head and laughed.</p><p>“Oh Heimdall. I’m still too weak to magic our clothes back on.”</p><p>He rolled off, pulling Heimdall into his arms. “I will need many more applications of your magic cock before I’m fully healed,” he whispered. </p><p>The door flew open. And that was how they found them. Naked, entangled, kissing, laughing fit to burst.</p><p>If this kind of nonsense could be going on in the midst of the chaos, maybe, just maybe, things would eventually come all right again.</p>
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